The critic as scorned diva

How exactly do you signal your acute disappointment to a publicist, who insisted you were on a guest list to a Los Lobos show, that you were in fact NOT on any such list, that the cheerless twentysomethings at will call and walking around with iPhones had never heard of you and couldn't care less that you had covered their show and helped in some small way to contribute to their pittence, without sounding like a whining drama queen primadonna asswipe?

This is something I should have an answer for, but curiously do not.

And the same publicist for whom said critic has extended himself this whole summer, and who is now faced with a meager four days to produce a cover story based on two interviews said publicist has done little to facilitate, thus guaranteeing a last minute firedrill for which they will bear absolutely zero accountability.

It seems my careful parsing of language must now be devoted to bullshit. Something here is just not right.